​Sometimes, the only time you get uninterrupted time with other moms is at 9 am on a Friday. My friend Amanda and I decided semi-last minute (and by last minute I mean 5-7 days ago because let's be honest, when you have kids you have to plan things waaaaay in advance) to try out a restaurant we had heard a lot about in Winter Park: The Coop

I was excited to try The Coop because the same people who own 4Rivers own it, and I looooove me some brisket and mac and cheese and french fries. And Cheerwine. Amanda picked me up right at 9, and we braved I-4 traffic into the charming Winter Park district. Amanda has a thing for taking pictures of cool murals and walls, so before we went in, we pretended we were Insta-famous and took a few cute shots of the painted walls on the outside of the building. 

The place was pretty empty (because normal people are at work at 9 am on a Friday), so we went right up to the counter and ordered. I knew from the get-go that I was going to get chicken and waffles; it's my go-to when it comes to breakfast. I also got a soft drink (Hi I'm Diana, and I'm a Dr. Pepper addict), and my total was $14 and change. Amanda ordered the Caramelized Croissant French Toast and asked for no pecans. We had a whole conversation with the woman at the counter about that fact that although she's not allergic, she just really doesn't like pecans. (Sidenote: Who doesn't like pecans?!) The nice woman at the counter gave us our numbers, and we picked a seat. 

As we chatted about mom life, my plate of chicken and waffles came to the table. Amanda's French Toast didn't come at the same time, so we waited and chatted about travel and mom life and potty training. You know, the usual mom conversation topics. 

​And then we realized it had been at least another 10 minutes since my food had come out and the French Toast was nowhere in sight. We noticed another customer approach the counter with her number and asked a manager about the status of her food, so we assumed we weren't the only ones waiting for our food. 

Finally, we saw a waitress coming toward us with a plate, and we were excited to be able to eat. And, like in slow motion, the dish was placed in front of Amanda.

With pecans.

She politely reminded the sweet employee that she had requested no pecans, and she rushed back to make it right. Just a few minutes later, a beautiful plate of French Toast came back to the table, sans pecans (hey that rhymes).

We poured the restaurant's signature maple bacon syrup all over our plates and enjoyed. My plate of chicken and waffles was good, and the portion size was impressive, but overall, it was fried chicken and four mini waffles. Good, but not great. Her French Toast wasn't as sweet as expected, but it was colorful and topped with fresh berries that made it a very pretty dish. 

We ventured out to the patio where we found another painted mural wall and took a few pictures. The patio would be a cute place to hang out at night, with ample picnic tables and string lights. We were a little confused about the phrase on the wall. Anyone else see an issue?

Overall, I'd give The Coop three out of five stars. The staff was friendly, the atmosphere was cute and clean. The food? Decent but maybe not worth $15. 

We loved Winter Park and want to do another mom date there again soon. Where should we go? 

At 6:05 this morning, there was only one place I wanted to be. Snuggled in our perfectly worn comforter, in my PJS, fast asleep. When Sarah asked innocently if I was planning on going for a run, I groaned at the idea and put the pillow over my head. No, I thought to myself, now is not the time. Doesn't the Bible say something about there's a time for sleeping and a time for running? Now is the time for sleeping. 

You'll be happy you did she said in a sing-songy voice of someone who had been awake for an hour already. I tried to go back to sleep, but I was awake. I flung the covers off, rummaged through my drawer for running clothes, and tied my shoes. When I caught a glance of myself in the mirror, I looked like the internet sensation, Grumpy Cat. (RIP) 

By 6:22, I was out the door, headphones in, and trekking up the first hill in my neighborhood. This was my time. This was my 30 minutes not to be needed by little boys, not to listen to Youtubers play with Barbies in the background, to not find shoes that are in plain sight. As I rounded the corner, I realized I was happy that I had made the time to run. It set the tone for the rest of the day. 

I made the time for me. I know me, and I would not have found the time in the 23.5 hours left in the day to run, so I made it (with a little encouragement from the wife and a lot of grumbling.) We will never find the time for the things that will propel us towards our goals and dreams, so we have to make it. I'm not super passionate about running, but I know its good for me, and I know doing it fills my bucket so I can fill everyone else's. So I made time.

If we keep waiting for the perfect time to work for our goals, we'll never do it. The question really comes down to, what are you willing to give up to get what you want?  

Sleep? 
Free weekends? 
Nights spent scrolling Instagram or binge-watching The Office? 

How important is this next big thing you want and what are you willing to let go of so you can MAKE the time to pursue it?

You probably do not have the time in your current schedule to dedicate significant chunks of time towards your goal. So that means that you have to adjust your current schedule. The lie is that you do not have enough time right now to make progress toward what you are passionate about. You do have time; you just have to create it.

You made the time to get dinner with friends last week
You made time to create a "Vacations I want to go on" board on Pinterest
You made time to hit snooze seven times
You made time to stalk people on Facebook and take boomerangs of your cat jumping off the window sill.

If it's important to you, you'll find a way. If it's not, you'll find an excuse. 

Not having the time is an excuse, and a lie meant to keep you in the same place and keep you safe.

Make the time. There are people whose lives will be better because you made the time to follow your dreams,

Make. The. Time. 

​

Disclaimer: I understand this is a horrible picture. I didn't get any good pictures but I still wanted to leave a review. Next time I'll get better pictures. 

Now that the wife and I are both working from home, we like to escape and do little day dates every once in a while. I saw someone post something about The Mexican Camel on Instagram, and I loved the name. I have a thing about names. I don't like things with weird names or names that make me uncomfortable.

Cheddars, for example. I've been there and loved it, but I really don't like that name. It sounds gross to me. Krispy Kreme is on the fence for me because the double K's aren't necessary. Light the torches. Send the mob. I know, I know. I just can't get behind it. And then there is anything that ends in world or land. Shoe land? Really? You couldn't think of anything more creative than that? Disney is the exception, obviously.

Anyway, back to The Mexican Camel. We met some friends there for lunch today. It was tucked in the back of a touristy shopping center on I-drive. The inside was cute, very colorful, and plenty of seating, but nothing really Instagram worthy. And aren't all restaurants supposed to base their designs on insta-worthiness? Yeah, I thought so. Overall experience and aesthetics of the place: 3 out of 5

Now if you know me, you know I love me some Chipotle. The cilantro lime rice. All the toppings. Guac for days (yes I know it's extra) and the chips for dipping. So when I heard it was like Chipotle with a little flair, I was all about it. The flair that makes The Mexican Camel different from Chipotle is the Mediterranean options. I like that you can go full on Mexican with the barbacoa and salsa and guac and cheese. Or you can channel your inner Greek and go to town with the pita, pickled turnips, lentil rice, and tzatziki. Or you can go crazy and mix it all up. I love options, so I was all about it. It's important to know that while I love to have options; I don't always take advantage of all of the options. So there, in line at The Mexican Camel, I gave them my exact Chipotle order.

Chicken
White rice
Black beans
Mild salsa
Corn
Sour cream
Cheese
Guac

Sarah went with the more Mediterranean side of things, and our total (with my soft drink) came to $25. I guess my chicken kabobs were a specialty option.

We sat by the window and had an effortless hour long conversation with our dear friends. Half of the table was mostly listening, so we were able to eat our food. The two talkers barely touched theirs but got their lunch to go.

Overall, I'm not sure I'd go again. Maybe I should try the Med side and leave my Chipotle order to the pros. At Chipotle. The bowl was good, but pretty bland. I tried squeezing some limes all over it but it really just tasted like plain white rice and chicken. It wasn't bad, and I ate it all, it just didn't wow my socks off (as the cools kids say.) 

And I'm sure PETA and the US Environmental Agency and NASA and the Men In Black and The League Of Turtle Supports will love this part, but The Mexican Camel gave out paper straws. I get it, save the turtles. But I'm not a fan of drinking my fizzy drink out of a soggy piece of paper.

This review feels negative, but I don't mean it to be. I feel like I'd give it another chance and maybe get a pita with chicken, and tomato cucumber salad, and feta cheese. I bet that would be awesome.

Overall, I'd give The Mexican Camel a 3 out of 5. I loved my lunch date with my wife and my friends, and am thankful for an afternoon out of the house and good conversations. Oh and the free warm churros. That was a plus.

Have you been to the Mexican Camel?

​

Here's a list of all the things I don't have:

• A journalism degree
• Experience reading my work out loud at a trendy coffee shop where people snap for me instead of clap
• An office
• A publication in a popular magazine
• A well-known book in bookstores with my name on it
• Experience at a writers retreat or conference or workshop
• A special fancy certification documenting my ability to write
• A steady paycheck
• Experience teaching a writing course

I don't have all these things. Therefore, I don't know enough or have enough to pursue my dream as a full-time career.

Lie lie lie lie lie.

When we create reasons and justifications that we do not have enough or we do not know enough to pursue what sets are heart on fire, we are just feeding fear. We put up these excuses because we are afraid about what would happen if we stopped believing them. If we believe the lie that we have to have it all together in order to move forward, all we do is stay stagnant. If we wait until we think we have all of the credentials, all of their resources, all of the time, all the talent, and all of the skills to confidently pursue what we love, we'll never do it. We will never have everything we need. The only thing we can do is work with what we have at the moment. Everything else will come with experience. 

I have friends who don't pursue their dream of being a well-known mommy blogger simply because right now they don't have as many followers as Kim Kardashian. I have friends who dream about owning their own pre-school, but all they have right now is a part-time job at a daycare. I know a guy who wants to start his own landscaping business, but he won't get up and do it because he doesn't have a fancy lawn care truck or the coolest weed eater machine on the market. 

Personally, I've always had this stir in my heart to write a children's book called Awesome Dawson, but I can give you a list a hundred miles long of why I don't have enough or know enough to do it.

I've never written a children's book before. 
I don't know how to draw.
I don't know the editing and publishing process.
No one's going to want to read it. 
I don't have enough time with all my other clients.

It's all a freaking lie. Everybody starts at the beginning. All of the famous authors, well-known playwrights, artists, entrepreneurs, small business owners- they all began at square one. They all took what they had at the time and did something great with it. Or they took what they had at the time, and they failed. And then they learned from it, and they tried again. Either way, nobody has all the resources and all the knowledge when they start something new. It's just not how it works. 

Chances are, you know more about what you want to do than you did last year. And even if you don't have any additional resources now than you did back then,  your vision for what you want to do and who you want to be is probably a little bit more evident than it was two years ago. Which means you are continually making progress without having all of the fancy equipment or fancy certifications or degrees that you keep convincing yourself that you need. 

When you get excited about taking the next step towards the big thing you want to do, and that a little annoying voice reminds you that "I don't know enough or have enough to do this" you can stop that voice right in its tracks. Identify it as fear, and list all the things that you do have that make you completely capable of pursuing your goal. 

Imagine the things we could do if we stopped waiting for the perfect time and used what we had to take the next right step. For me, that means setting a date to start the writing process for Awesome Dawson. You heard it here, folks. I'm going to use the resources, knowledge, experience, and skill set that I have at this very moment to do something that scares me a little bit. And I will trust in the process and have faith that I will learn what I need to learn along the way.

 I challenge you to do the same.

I remember my first freelance job so well. The client needed someone to come up with as many words that included the word "up" as possible. I don't even remember what it was for, but I do remember sitting curled up in our torn up leather chair with my phone.

Shut up
Throw up
Grown-up
Up the creek
Upstairs
Up yours
Stand Up
Show Up

For the whole weekend, my brain was consumed with the word up. When I was done, I submitted my work and was paid $25. Well, actually $20 because the online platform I was using took 20%. 

The next project after that, I did for free, just to get good reviews and build my portfolio. And the job after that. And the job after that. A few projects later, the client listed her budget as $30, and I agreed to do it for $15 just to get the job and continue to build relationships with clients. On the first project that the client wasn't happy with my work, I waived my fee entirely to preserve the relationship. 

In my first month of actually getting paid to write, I made $114. And, when I did my calculations correctly, I realized that continuing like this would make me the proud receipt of a $1350 annual salary. Not exactly the "baller" lifestyle I'd been hoping for. I had spent quite a bit of time writing and editing that month, and as I deposited less than $100 into my account at the end of the month, (dangit taxes), I heard that voice. That voice I'd become so used to hearing during this journey.

"You can't make money doing this"

And at $100 a month, that voice was exactly right. I could not have helped to support my family at this rate.

But here's the kicker: This is where I started, not where I stayed.

When we start a new adventure that we hope turns into a profitable side hustle or full-time job, we have to be ok with being beginners. Because that's what we are. Very rarely do we start a business and immediately see the cash roll in. It's a learning process. It is practice in being patient with the process and being flexible. If we give up in the beginning because we aren't rolling in the dough right away, we don't really deserve to roll in said dough. 

Slowly, slowwwlllyyyy, over the course of years, I started to raise my prices. One client, one job at a time, I'd start to increase my rates minimally. I began to become more confident in my rates and even started to say no to clients who asked me to do work for less than my set rate. As I started to say no to clients who wanted to pay me next to nothing for a week's worth of work, I began to make time in my schedule for clients who appreciated my time and talent and were happy to pay me accordingly.

And while we're talking about getting paid accordingly, here's another little fun tidbit: Do not feel pressured to do work for free or for steep discounts for family and friends.

One more time for the people in the back. You. Do. Not. Have. To. Give. Your. Work. Away.

Your talent is the way you make money, pay bills, and put food on the table. Your friends and family should not expect you to take from your own pocket and give it to them. If you want to do it for free, great. If you're going to offer a small discount, fine. But your friends and family should not expect free or discounted work. And you should not feel bad for saying no when they do. If they make you feel bad for not giving away your time and resources, get new friends and family. Just kidding, but seriously. You can't make money doing this if you're always giving things away. Your time is precious. Be selfish with it. 

Now, I'm setting monthly goals 40x higher than my first month and reaching them. I'm in the driver's seat when it comes to what I charge and how long it takes. If this doesn't work for the client, I don't lose a wink of sleep. I'm not desperate for the work. I'm good. And I do make money doing this. 

But I can't express what a slow and gradual process this was. It has taken me years to build my confidence, raise my rates, be picky about my clients, and be selective about the work that I do. It was a learning experience with plenty of trial and error (lots of errors) and adjustments.

Here's the truth: You can make money doing what you love, but you have to be patient. And you have to be willing to compromise and sacrifice in the beginning so that you can be in control later. 

And you have to remember that where you start is not where you'll stay. So keep working, keep trusting, and keep doing what you love. The money will come. 

This is so creative, I thought to myself, everyone is going to love it. I clicked "publish" and then "share" and waited for the waves of social media notifications to come flooding in. I'm pretty sure I'm going to break the internet with this one, I thought. Well not really, I'm not THAT cocky, but I was very confident that the piece that I wrote would generate a significant response.

Submit.
Wait.
Refresh.
Wait.
Refresh.
Take a shower
Check phone with soapy hands.
Wait.
Refresh.
Restart phone because there must be a technical issue.
Wait.
Refresh.

Nothing. No likes, no comments. I checked and checked to make sure it posted. I re-read it, making sure I wrote in English. I spent so much time worrying about why nobody was responding. And then, amongst the crickets, I heard it. "Your social media presence is a direct reflection of your talent, ability, and value."

Dangit. That's true, I thought. I've posted things before and got a great response, so I was sure I was a good writer. But I guess I've lost it. People don't like what I do. I'm not good at it. If I were, the proof would be in the likes and comments. I'm going to delete it.

I re-read my article one more time. I liked it, but not as much as I liked it the first time. They were right, all of those social media people, this was lame. And as my finger hovered over the delete post button, a notification came through. My heart jumped. Dangit. Just a girl from high school I never talk to anymore. Barely even counts. But I didn't delete the post. Instead, I kept waiting, hoping, and I'm embarrassed to say, obsessing.

That's lie number two: Your social media following is a direct reflection of your talent, ability, and value.

Umm, no. We've all become so dependent on showcasing the best parts of our life for everyone to see, and have become obsessed about the response we get. If people like and comment, we feel validated. If there's silence, we're sure we've done something wrong.

We put so much of our value in what other people say about us, that we forget to do what we love simply because we love it.

If we always measure our ability on the reaction of others, we will always be let down. Someone will always have something negative to say. Your work will never appeal to everyone. Heck, YOU will never appeal to everyone. That doesn't mean you are less valuable, or what you can do is unworthy.

Here's the truth: Our worth, our skills, and our talents are not decided on by 200 people we barely know on Facebook. We have to live, work, and create because it is something we inherently love to do. We need to get to the point where we do what do even at the risk of nobody ever reading the book, buying the art, or seeing the show. When we do what makes us feel creative and productive regardless of the response, we will be so much happier.

Social media doesn't get to decide whether you are a good writer or a good parent or a good employee or a good friend or a good daughter. Social media doesn't get to control what you create or why you create it. The sooner you can release the control that social media has over you and your creative spirit, the happier and more productive you will be.

My wife worked her butt off so that once our little bundle of joy arrived, I'd be able to stay home with him for a whole year. Once that year came to a close and discussions arose about me going back to work, the idea of writing from home in my PJs and staying home with the boy seemed much more appealing. So I decided to get serious about writing full time to make extra income for our family. But as soon as I'd get going, submitting proposals to online writing platforms looking for clients, that annoying little voice would remind me that "Anyone can do this. Nobody is going to hire you."

Writing came so naturally to me, it was fun, and I enjoyed it, which had to mean that it wasn't work. Why would anyone pay someone to write their web content or their blogs instead of just doing it themselves? I was sure that because it was easy for me, it must be easy for everyone else, and my skills and experience were not valuable.

Well lemme tell you, that was lie number one.

Your gifts and talents, my gifts and talents, are ours for a reason. We can do things that many other people can not do. My wife can look at a math problem, or a glitching computer, or a smoking something-or-other that lives under the hood of my car, analyze tinker, and bada-boom-bada-bing. Her brain is wired to do that. She's good at it. And if she weren't my wife, I'd gladly pay her to help me with these types of things. She has a unique and valuable skill set. And so do I.

My friend Paige can look at a picture of a barn and use watercolors to actually paint a picture of a freakin' barn. That's insane. Do you know what would happen if I even tried to paint a picture of a barn?

My brother can walk into any room, stand on any stage, and immediately captivate the entire room. He does not hyperventilate. He does not lose sleep. He probably barely even practices. He's just good at it and what comes so naturally to him would make me hide in a hole.

My friend Jordan is like a DIY home improvement master. She can tear down a wall, paint a fireplace (didn't even know you could do that) plant a garden, install a ceiling fan, build a deck and retile her floors like nobody's business — all while wrangling twins. I barely know how to GET to Home Depot.

Five years into this whole freelance writing thing, I've realized the truth.

The truth is, what I can do is valuable. What comes easy to me does not come easy to other people. The thought of sitting down and writing a blog makes me excited; for other people, it makes them want to puke. Or maybe they can do it, but they're busy living lives and working in a career that they are good at and simply don't have the time. Either way, I have the time and the talent to do it, and people will hire me.

Lots of people have hired me.

Do not let that little annoying voice tell you that anyone can do what you do. Do not believe that whisper that tells you your skills are not valuable. There is someone out there who wishes they could do what comes so naturally to you. So be proud of what you do, market the heck out of yourself, and remember that you have a lot to offer.